GREAT CHEATER STORIES

Forums Forums BENCH RACING FROM THE PAST GREAT CHEATER STORIES

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  • #8995
    dino
    Keymaster

        Hey ..its been a long time …doesn’t matter now AND with new rules, what you tried to pull off back then probably wouldn’t work now……. SO LETS HEAR HOW- YOU- ATTEMPTED TO “BEAT THE SYSTEM”. Here’s What I saw from the tower EVERY WEEK: Good ole ‘Twistin’ Tex Edwards would pull in to park right behind the Tower ,coming from the tech lanes. He would take Two hands and a lot of effort to lift out of his El Camino bed (under the Bed tarp), this giant 5 gal bucket of scrap bolts, and metal debris that obvously had no other purpose than to jack the weight on the scales to put him in the top of the class.

        #13798
        gene-terenzio-sr
        Participant
            quote dinotheweirdo:

            Hey ..its been a long time …doesn’t matter now AND with new rules, what you tried to pull off back then probably wouldn’t work now……. SO LETS HEAR HOW- YOU- ATTEMPTED TO “BEAT THE SYSTEM”. Here’s What I saw from the tower EVERY WEEK: Good ole ‘Twistin’ Tex Edwards would pull in to park right behind the Tower ,coming from the tech lanes. He would take Two hands and a lot of effort to lift out of his El Camino bed (under the Bed tarp), this giant 5 gal bucket of scrap bolts, and metal debris that obvously had no other purpose than to jack the weight on the scales to put him in the top of the class. Her’s another “illegal Ballest’ story: I was up too late one Sat. and missed my ride to the track with my brother…..So I stood out on the hwy in Katonah ,to hitch hike to the track.Who stops for me ? Tom Iorizzo. No room in the tow car ,so I get in the race car on the passenger side ….Now every time we go over a bump, something “clanks’ under the rug??? so I reach down and pull the rug back ,and there stacked all over is a couplete set of bar-bell wheights 😯 …now, don’t think ol’ Tom was gonna work out at Lunch….more Hidden “Ballast” to fool the scales .

            Ya know what kills me, is when someone cheats and still gets there ass kicked,that got to kill the old ego. I remember one guy that we would beat every time we raced him and all he could do was shake his head. He was affectionately called balloon foot.:D 😀 😆 😆

            #13799
            dino
            Keymaster

                Gene …you ever hear of someone loading their chassis with buckshot ,to roll rear on acceration ,somehow increasing traction , then “leveling’ out at top end?

                #13800
                randy-fish

                    The best one I remember was from a Division 1 points race at Epping, New Hampshire. It involved a well-known Connecticut racer running in Comp Eliminator. I’m sure you guys remember him, as he had a Big-Block Chevy-powered, injected roadster before his budget made him run a four-cylinder combination towards the end of his career. Anyway, as I remember, he bombed the national record with the four-cylinder during qualifying. But in order to do that, the car was way light. Like most cheaters, the guy tries to appear legit, so he rolls it onto the scales and swaps his real helmet with one that weighed almost 100 pounds. That’s where they caught him. Naturally, he was ejected from the event, but it would have been better if they made him wear the helmet for the rest of the weekend.

                    #13802
                    anonymous

                        gene,” balloon foot ” is that anywhere near new cannan

                        #13803
                        gene-terenzio-sr
                        Participant
                            quote dinotheweirdo:

                            Gene …you ever hear of someone loading their chassis with buckshot ,to roll rear on acceration ,somehow increasing traction , then “leveling’ out at top end?

                            We loaded the BB/A with lead shot, but it was packed in it didn’t move, and it was caped off and welded in. I made a golf club with “steel” shot in the head, it moved from the front to the back when you swing and to the front when it hit the ball, tried to get it patented and went to Washington to the pat. office for the search, some guy did something like it back in the 1800s, plus the dead blow hammer patten covered any striking instruments.

                            #13804
                            gene-terenzio-sr
                            Participant
                                quote Randy Fish:

                                The best one I remember was from a Division 1 points race at Epping, New Hampshire. It involved a well-known Connecticut racer running in Comp Eliminator. I’m sure you guys remember him, as he had a Big-Block Chevy-powered, injected roadster before his budget made him run a four-cylinder combination towards the end of his career. Anyway, as I remember, he bombed the national record with the four-cylinder during qualifying. But in order to do that, the car was way light. Like most cheaters, the guy tries to appear legit, so he rolls it onto the scales and swaps his real helmet with one that weighed almost 100 pounds. That’s where they caught him. Naturally, he was ejected from the event, but it would have been better if they made him wear the helmet for the rest of the weekend.

                                Tied to his testicles. 😉

                                Heres one, A guy with a A/A ford power, drilled a hole in the spark plug seats so when they P&G’ed him the thing would leak and he would come up with less cu. in’s.

                                #13805
                                dino
                                Keymaster

                                    I Can see were this is going to go…… But lets have some fun ….Heres one from Dover …We had a I hour lunch break …just enough time to “alter “your car for eliminations. “Dumb Racers” from my Brother -the Tech inspector….Make a lightweight Scatter Shield out of Dry Cleaner Dress shirt cardboard and paint it flat black….real “foolproof” ’til the tech guy lights it up with his Zippo. OR* remove your entire Stock Class Racer exhaust pipes, mufflers to Loose weight…til the tech guy bends down ,looks underneath and Sends you back to the pits from the staging lanes.

                                    #13809
                                    billy-casey
                                        quote Randy Fish:

                                        The best one I remember was from a Division 1 points race at Epping, New Hampshire. It involved a well-known Connecticut racer running in Comp Eliminator. I’m sure you guys remember him, as he had a Big-Block Chevy-powered, injected roadster before his budget made him run a four-cylinder combination towards the end of his career. Anyway, as I remember, he bombed the national record with the four-cylinder during qualifying. But in order to do that, the car was way light. Like most cheaters, the guy tries to appear legit, so he rolls it onto the scales and swaps his real helmet with one that weighed almost 100 pounds. That’s where they caught him. Naturally, he was ejected from the event, but it would have been better if they made him wear the helmet for the rest of the weekend.

                                        ooooh yes,,, very clever,, can’t remember,but his first name begain with a E and ended with a D and i think his second name begain with a P and ended with a T…. ❓ … Oh yes now i remember… Billy 😆 😆 😆

                                        #13810
                                        dino
                                        Keymaster

                                            ED PROUT ………..I WIN………………not That Cleaver-He got caught

                                            #13811
                                            randy-fish

                                                Tied to his testicles. 😉

                                                Heres one, A guy with a A/A ford power, drilled a hole in the spark plug seats so when they P&G’ed him the thing would leak and he would come up with less cu. in’s.[/quote]

                                                I’m sure you have an idea who that was, Gene. And yes . . . Dino wins the two-pound Spicy Chalupa! Correct answer!

                                                Hey, I spent a great deal of time with Anthony and Mickey last weekend at Pomona. The conditions sucked but Anthony got it figured out. I’ll feature their car later in ’09. It’ll be in the same issue with Rick Jackson’s car, which I have to shoot at the Winternationals after it gets painted.

                                                I already told Anthony this, but you need to know, too. You guys were my heroes. I’ve got great memories of watching your cars. I even have a nighttime photo from Englishtown (that Bob McClurg gave me) on my office wall of the “Italian Way” BB/Altered. Thanks, man!

                                                #13812
                                                dino
                                                Keymaster

                                                    WAITING for Diggers reply to GENES Golf club invention…Should have used THAT at Cumberland Farms…Ever see a naked Golfer…not a preety sight

                                                    #13813
                                                    dino
                                                    Keymaster

                                                        The Italian Way of Golfing ….If ya can’t hit the ball…shoot it with buckshot….I LOVE MEX food Randy ! But now after that …Its back to Cheating…Yeah we called it Yankee Ingenuity

                                                        #13814
                                                        billy-casey

                                                            HEY DINO , BETTER GET A BIGGER WEB SITE FOR THIS TOPIC , BOY YOU STARTED IT NOW 😆 😆 😆 😆
                                                            i remember tommy’s 65 black chevy was protested for a camshaft , at the end of the day he went down to the barn and he pulled the cam..he had a stock cam hidden between the radiater housing and the grill .. handed the cam to Joe T. and so be it … 😆 Your not cheating unless you get caught [ Bill Jenkins] 👿 👿 👿 Billy

                                                            #13815
                                                            billy-casey

                                                                ED PROUT ………..I WIN………………not That Cleaver-He got caught[/quote
                                                                yes ,,, but not for a while

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